Whether your trauma occurred when you were a child, experienced recurring trauma throughout your life, or recently experienced a traumatic event, your body is likely to remember this experience. Unfortunately, many individuals have experienced trauma and have not felt safe or ready to address it. As a result, they can sometimes experience a negative turn in their relationships.
Here are a few ways in which your past trauma may be impacting your current relationship from the perspective of a Couples Therapist at Modern Wellness.
Battling Triggers As Part of the Healing Process
It is normal for trauma survivors to experience triggers as part of the healing process. In order to manage these triggers, individual trauma therapy can be helpful. However, if gone untreated, these triggers become a constant physical and emotional reminder of the traumatic experience. Experiencing triggers can arise in your couple’s relationship. Which unfortunately can lead to re-traumatization, especially if your partner is unaware of the trauma or does not know how to help.
Triggers Remind You of the Traumatic Experience
A trigger is an experience that may remind you of the traumatic experience and can be challenging to control. Triggers can include all of your senses. For example, a smell, sound, visualization or even thoughts about the traumatic experience. The result of experiencing a trigger can lead to a physical response (i.e. feeling tense, breathing fast, upset stomach). Or emotional shift (i.e. anger, sadness, worry). Even a change in cognitive thought (i.e. thoughts related to not feeling safe or thinking the worse outcome). If you are having trouble identifying and managing triggers, our online therapist can help you overcome your trauma by beginning trauma therapy.
Difficulty Trusting Others Due To Past Trauma
If you have experienced some past trauma, you have noticed that it can be difficult to trust others. This can include your partner. Which makes it challenging to create and experience a close and safe relationship. There is a high probability that you and your partner may be experiencing some distance. Maybe you are even having trouble connecting. Especially in times when a vulnerability is needed.
Trust Issues With Couples
Trust issues within couples can come up in many forms. It may manifest as the fear that your partner will leave you or cheat on you. There can also be thoughts related to feeling that you are not enough or not deserving of the relationship. This may lead to self-sabotage behaviors of pushing your partner away when they are trying to form a connection with you.
Difficulty Trusting Yourself
Trust issues can also present themselves if you are having trouble trusting yourself and your own decisions. You may find yourself questioning your decisions out of fear that you may end up in yet another traumatic situation. This sense of self-blame and shame can be really frustrating when trying to be optimistic; however, this underlying emotion and thought get in the way.
Working With an Online Trauma Therapist Can Help You Develop Trust
This internal battle of trusting your partner, trusting yourself, and accepting your sense of worth, is something that is affected by untreated past trauma. Reaching out to an online therapist for trauma therapy can be helpful in overcoming this for yourself and in your relationship.
Lack of communication
Unresolved past trauma can lead to communication difficulties within a relationship. This can make it challenging for you and your partner to understand and support each other. Communication is one of the top reasons couples begin online couples counseling. And when there is past trauma, there are multiple blocks that have to be tackled.
Untreated Trauma’s Impact
As mentioned before, trust can be impacted by untreated trauma, which can impact your feeling comfortable with communicating vulnerable emotions and/or expressing your needs.
Online Trauma Therapy Can Improve Relationship Skills
Many couples who begin couples counseling often want to improve their communication skills and sometimes may not know what is getting in the way of understanding each other. Working through some past traumatic wounds and experiences can be beneficial to overcoming blocks, identifying needs, and feeling safe and secure to express yourself.
Emotional roller straining your relationship
Emotional regulation is something that is impacted when you have experienced past trauma. If you have not taken time to process your individual past trauma, you may experience sudden outbursts of anger, hypervigilance, anxiety, and depression. Even stressful situations can be terrifying in that you may experience a negative mental spiral where it can be easy to catastrophize situations and events.
Learn How to Self-Regulate with Trauma Therapy
Finding it challenging to regulate your emotions can put a strain on your relationship. Individual trauma therapy can help you learn how to identify triggers and practice a variety of self-regulating techniques. In couples therapy, licensed therapists also help couples understand the importance of implementing self-regulating behaviors while communicating.
Intimacy problems:
Depending on the kind of past trauma, if you have experienced a traumatic event, you may have noticed a shift in your sexual functioning or may have trouble connecting emotionally with yourself and your partner, which can affect overall intimacy in your relationship. This is a normal response if you have experienced trauma, as your body is responding in a way to keep you safe and comfortable.
Past Trauma Can Impact Your Ability to be Intimate with Your Partner
When in romantic relationships, intimacy is an important part of maintaining connection and is a part that can suffer if trauma is not addressed. The way this happens is that if the previous aspects of a relationship are hindered (i.e., lack of trust, lack of communication, unable to emotionally regulate), then of course, intimacy will be impacted.
When taking time to address past traumatic events, you may notice a shift in feeling confident in yourself, trusting others, and being able to comfortably be close to others as well, which in turn can positively impact your intimacy with yourself and your partner.
Closing Thoughts From a Trauma Therapist
It is important for couples to be aware of these potential impacts and seek support from a therapist to help address and overcome these challenges in their relationship. Beginning individual trauma therapy can be a great way to start the process.
Begin Online Trauma Therapy in San Antonio, TX
Getting Scheduled
Getting started with a trauma therapist for Trauma Therapy is easy and convenient. You can schedule online through our client portal.
If you are planning to use your insurance, please note that only a few clinicians accept limited insurance plans for Therapy for Anxiety. You can give our office a call at 210-706-0392 and our intake coordinator can answer any questions you may have. If your insurance is accepted, she can get you scheduled and gather the needed insurance information.
What we need from you
In order to get scheduled for online anxiety therapy, we will need the following from you (whether you schedule online or by phone): your full name, email address, and phone number.
We do require you to make a $40 deposit to hold your intake session. This deposit goes toward your first session’s payment.
What to expect between scheduling and your session
After you get scheduled, you will receive a link to your secured client portal. You will have documents to sign and complete 24 hours before your intake session. This allows for your intake session to be focused on your presenting issue.
Ten minutes before your session, you will receive a secured link for your video call. You can use this link to join in on your online therapy session.
Other Therapy & Counseling Services at Modern Wellness Counseling
In addition to Online Trauma Therapy, learn more about our range of therapy and counseling services including premarital counseling, Online Therapy for Anxiety, and individual counseling, to help you thrive in relationships and life!
By Priscilla Rodriguez, M.S., LMFT, Owner of Modern Wellness Counseling
Priscilla specializes in working with couples and individuals who have experienced issues with communication. As well as those who are looking to find healthy ways to reconnect with their partner. She utilizes research-based techniques to help clients implement healthy coping skills and communication skills. Priscilla has also chosen clinicians to join Modern Wellness Counseling who can also help you in your therapy journey. Be sure to reach out to us to get started with therapy.
